P is for Proud: Why Parents’ Can’t Stop Talking About their Kids

Today I went to a really yummy business lunch with some co-workers and we all noticed, silently and out loud, that all we could talk about was our kids. Even when we tried to change the topic, it went back to kids.

We’re proud of our littles, of course, but what else drives us to talk about them at every opportunity? To blog, Instagram, cherish and chart their every pip and squeak?

I have a few theories, beyond the basic sense of pride.

1. Shared Experiences:

In the olden, way back days before the internet, people gathered together to talk at the butcher’s shop or general store or whatever, and they talked about a shared world. They had a lot in common besides the weather—they probably had shared friends and family, shared memories of the community, and shared places that they were all familiar with. Now, we find those “shares” in a much broader, more global sense. We may not have a single person in common with the person we are waiting in line with at the grocery store, and that person may be just passing through on her way elsewhere—but we share our horror and grief over the Hurricane Harvey damage in Texas, we share our bewildered but undeniable obsessions with certain celebrities, and we share with all the universe a love of children. It’s easy to connect and bond with someone when you find something that you share, and we instinctively know that asking about someone’s kids will gain their trust.

2. Expressing Ourselves:

So much of our background noise in our daily lives revolves around the kids, but we don’t always have a good way to express it. There are so many unsaid, reflective moments in parenting—the countless times you’ve put your hand out for them to hold, the countless times you’ve wiped their nose, the countless times you’ve zipped their coat or buckled their shoe or pulled down a bunched up pant leg. In a thousand little ways every day you are actively doing something for this other little person that didn’t even exist a few months or years ago, and its pretty profound but also so mundane. Speaking with other parents about the act of parenting is such a relief because you can give voice to some of the experiences that are your, weirdly, your new normal.

3. Research Purposes:

Speaking of normal, aren’t all parenting conversations basically just trying to figure out if they/their kid is normal? After we’ve bragged about how cute they are, there is a lot of talk of poop and what they’re eating and how do they sleep and what words they know. Parents are talking about their kid, but they are also researching their kid and gathering resources for future kid talks, about poop or anything else. Mostly poop.

I think, ultimately, that although it is godawful to be seated next to parents who wont' stop talking about each other's kids, it isn't so bad if parents want to indulge.

It beats the weather or politics these days!

#parents #parenthood #kids #mommyproblems